My pig Larry likes wallowing in mud. When I pointed this out to him, he called me a neat freak. Yea, my pig is like Alf, he can talk. I got mad and called him a slob. He called me predictable. So I retaliated by hosing him down with water. He didn’t like that and called me the big bad wolf. I told him I am no wolf, lamb chops. He got even madder, because lambs are stupid. I was like wow Mr. Smelly way to face reality! He told me I was just a little boy in my own little world. I responded, thanks Mr. Rogers for that enlightening comment! Hey, look who it is its gizmo in the flesh, so when you eat at night do you multiple? When you get wet do you turn into your own freak show? He squealed in anger after I said that! Squealer, squealer! Hey he said, at least I’m desired. Yea for tasty mouth watering bacon, I said. I was like by the way how is Miss Piggy? Oops, I forgot she dumped you for a frog! How does it feel to be Kermit’s bitch? Haha, I couldn’t stop laughing until Larry pointed out to me that he liked his bacon crispy, and that if I didn’t shut up he would turn me into it. Wow, you’re a cannibal, he smirked at me in agreement and eventually our discussion calmed down and we talked about other things. What are those things? You’ll have to wait.
Ps. Pig pen was so happy that I didn't mention him in this.
